half | shell $crypt

so here I am, the shadow,
hollowed husk, of a sad soul,
wondering if anything can ever really be made whole.
it's in my darkest moment I feel most poetic!
..stressed, depressed, doing my very best to make sense of it
and i know after these rants, that I'm blocked, by your algorithms
i scream into the void hoping someone can find some meaning of some kind

..id like to find that myself.
I'd like to shake this hell we feel too well and move on in good health

but it's hard to hold hope, when moving through time and space is just really really painful- I stay still for self preservation, pardon the hesitation, but i'm a little overwhelmed.

BUT if I could, I would, choose the bliss of okayness,
to be okay, and impose okay on the world would be just great, okay?

Okay, great.
so what do I do?

was i broke, or did i break myself
was it my bad, or maybe someone else, woah
im angry half the time.

did i get broke? don't feel like myself,
slowly CHANGING into something else, woah
all I wanna do is cry; I'm angry half the time

WHAT DO I DO ?

what did I do to deserve this?
i've been searching round the world for some sense of purpose..
i can stuff down these emotions, for what feels like forever,
or EXPLODE in some capacity, as a quaint cry for help;

it's the peril of duality;
the optimist inside of me
will more than likely kill this cry come morning,

but tonight before i go, you should know..
tonight, the shadow speaks out.
I speak out; what do I do?

did i explode? don't feel like myself,
slowly CHANGING into something else, oh
all I wanna do is cry